I just can't even believe that Colton is 3! I laid in bed the other night and re-lived the day that Colton was born. I could picture everything. I remember my doctor walking over to talk to the nurse then coming to my bedside to tell me that Colton was showing 4 markers for Down Syndrome. And I could feel the emotions/feelings that came when she said it...the stabbing knife hitting my chest...the loss for words...the confusion and shock...and the drowning out of all of the other sounds in the room as my head began to spin, trying to process the news. At that moment, I couldn't picture what life would look like with a child with Down Syndrome. In my mind, it would be sad...it would be hard...it would be depressing. I thought I was dreaming, but I never woke up. I was living a nightmare and I was scared to death.
I can't change the way I felt the day Colton was born. And I don't want to hide those emotions, either...because they were real. It does make me a little sad that I was so heartbroken the day he was born instead of joyful, but the truth is...I'm human and life didn't go as expected. But how many times in life do things not go the way we expect, yet it somehow turns out to be just what we needed?
Colton is exactly what I needed. I can't imagine my life without my Colton...my little ray of sunshine. He's been in our life for 3 years...and what an amazing 3 years it has been!! Colton is doing so well and has come so far and life with him is 1,000 times better than I expected. He is full of personality and makes us laugh and smile every single day. His teacher told me the other day that "he really is perfection breathing..." I'm not sure a Mama can hear a greater compliment from a teacher. Colton loves school and walks the halls like he owns the place. And he's like a little celebrity...parents, kids, and teachers walking by saying, "Hi, Colton!" Colton sure steals the hearts of others...and watching people love him and accept him makes my Mama heart SO incredibly happy and proud. Another teacher at his school told me a few weeks ago, "I love the way you love him." Because it's obvious when you see me with Colton that I am completely head over heals in love with him. The highlight of my day is picking him up from school and asking him, "Colton, did you have a good day?" And him responding, "Good day." (sometimes, ha!) OOOOOOHHHH, I love me some Colty bear. He lets me squeeze him and kiss him and rock him to sleep...and he's just so squishy and cuddly!
We had a party for Colton on his actual birthday at Rock City MMA and it was a blast! I don't think Colton really understands what a birthday is...but I sang, "Happy Birthday" to him at least 25 times so that he'd realize it was HIS special day. HIS birthday. When we'd sing to him, we'd get him to say, "ME!" It was so cute! He can also say that he's 3, but he can't quite get his fingers to cooperate to show us he's 3. Colton is so sweet. He doesn't expect a thing. Doesn't ask for gifts, doesn't request a party or a theme...he's just go with the flow and his eyes light up with excitement when we sing to him or give him gifts. Weston and I pretty much have to open all of his gifts for him because he's too busy playing with the gift he received last. He had a wonderful birthday! Colton is blessed to have so many family and friends who love him.
Here's a few pictures from his party:
I'm so thankful that Colton goes to school where he is loved. He had so many little friends come to celebrate him. It made me so happy! What a fun party we had! And we made the parents get involved and get lots of exercise, too. I think everyone was worn out by the time we left. We finished his party with a chocolate chip cookie cake and singing to Colton...which he LOVED!
Colton Dean, you are one special little boy! Nothing about life with you is sad. The hardest day of my life gave me the most wonderful little boy...and I'd redo that day over and over again just to have you here with me. Because you, my son, are amazing! I can't believe you are 3! I'm excited to watch you grow and learn this year. Happy Birthday, Dude!
