If I had to choose the greatest lesson I've learned since hearing Colton's diagnosis, it would have to be Perspective.
I have my days when I'm stressed or sad that Colton has DS. I think back to when Weston, my oldest son, was 13 months old. There were so many things that I took for granted. Weston could crawl, walk, run, climb, jump, clap, wave, self-feed, swallow liquids, see, and rarely went to the doctor. Weston grew up so fast and those milestones flew by...and I didn't appreciate them. I remember being so physically tired because all I did was chase him around and make sure he didn't hurt himself every second of every day. And now, with Colton, I so wish I was chasing him around and watching him blow through those milestones. Colton is making progress...but that progress is really, really slow. Things that Weston picked up naturally, Colton doesn't. I have to teach him how to sit up from lying on his back. I have to teach him to put things in his mouth. I have to teach him how to suck from a straw. We haven't lowered his crib mattress because he can't pull to his knees or pull to stand. I'm not chasing him all over the house because he will pretty much stay where I put him....with the exception of a few rolls in either direction. In some ways, Colton is easier...but only because he's not blowing through milestones like Weston did. Weston was physically exhausting. Colton is mentally exhausting.
But when I have my down days...I try to put things into Perspective. To think about things from somebody else's point of view. There are so many people out there who wish they were in my shoes. Who wish they had a child to love and teach. I recently heard about a lady who found out her baby had Trisomy 18 and he won't live more than a few days after birth. She wishes she had a child with Trisomy 21 that could live a long life. There are people out there that have lost a child or who can't get pregnant. They would long to have a child, even with special needs. I hear about these things all of the time...and I know that God is the reason. He knows just how to put people in my life at the right time...to give me perspective. To show me that what I'm going through isn't so bad. To show me that I'm blessed. That I'm the lucky one. I have a beautiful, healthy baby boy. His smile and pure happiness draw people in EVERYWHERE I go. They always comment on Colton. He makes people happy. He makes me happy. Yes, he's behind...but in the big picture of life...does that really matter? Who cares when he crawls or when he walks or when he reads? He will get there...at his own pace. Don't we all just want our children to be happy...to be good people...to bring joy to those around them?
I want to use my experiences to help others. Having Colton has changed my world...my perspective. I want to encourage you...when you're having a down day and you're feeling sad, stressed, tired, cheated, etc... Try to put yourself in somebody else's shoes. There's someone out there who would love to have a husband to fight with, a child to work with or chase, a husband who has a job that requires him to work late or travel, a house to live in, a mom or dad to call in times of need, a car to get them places, etc... You can always find the positive in your life. Nobody's life is perfect. We all go through tough times and wish things were different. Life is all about Perspective. Find the good in your life...and remember, somebody out there would love to be in your shoes. "Being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect; it means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections and enjoy the day."
"If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." Dr. Wayne Dyer
"The right perspective makes the impossible possible."
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